did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Randomize
