Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
Randomize
