We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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