: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
