When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Randomize
