Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
