I like to think it a success when the cops are called
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize