the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
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