I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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