walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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