im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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