Come see our sink grown plant.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Randomize
