We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
That's how pantless uber rides happen
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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