I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
Randomize
