Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
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