Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Randomize
