spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
