right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Randomize
