So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Randomize