If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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