a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Randomize
