answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize
