yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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