he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
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