people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
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