doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
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