He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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