Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
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