I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Randomize
