It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Randomize
