yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Quick, to the slutcave!
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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