You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Randomize
