Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
