for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
