u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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