she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Randomize
