ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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