I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Randomize
