Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
