Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
