my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
I will be naked everywhere
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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