around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Randomize
