Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Randomize
