oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
my poor anus
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Randomize
