Where are you?
In a non slutty way
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
