She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
