u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Randomize