Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
where does the pee come out of this thing
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
