Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize