Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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